The new survival of the fittest is to not die from drugs and alcohol.
I’m feeling happy.
Boyfriend and I, still great.
The nightmares are back, though bearable.
Need to work out the living situation. I wish to escape spending so much dead money. I should buy a house instead of a car, I want the car though, I feel like I’m missing out. Short term VS long term.
I want to travel, I want to see things, experience things.
So in theory, lets figure:
1) Yearly salary after tax
2) Deduct rent
3) Deduct amount for food/transport
4) Total – there still being a fat left.
5) Things to make you happy – drinking, cigarettes, bars, clubs, restaurants – per week
6) Total – what could afford to save each week.
So I could approximately save around $3000 a year.
I wish things were handed to me.
I’m still in holiday mode, and it sucks to be back at work. I just don’t know where to go from here. I enjoy this, but it just isn’t what I saw myself doing and I doubt I would be motivated enough to go to university. The mere idea of university is terrifying and overwhelming to me. It would be nice if I worked with people I got along with. Or if I could continue doing this job, get qualified, without going to university. I wish I had more motivation, I want to finish my portfolio, I want to make t-shirts!
The relationship with Zap, is by far the best I’ve ever had.
