I'm particularly not good at hiding things. When I get caught doing something I shouldn't, I can't lie to save me, in fact I dig the hole a little deeper.
So this morning I had this feeling "fuck. I should really get a train ticket" but the fact that they check the tickets maybe once a month is disheartening when you go to outstanding lengths to possess one. I normally do get a ticket, but since I didn't have any cash on me and I already asked JR and R last week for spare change I decided I would brave it.
I get off the train and there at least 10 ticketee's by every door. dust.
Go upstairs. 50+ ticketees writing everyone fines.
fuck.
I go to Mcdonalds to get some cash out.
I know there is no escaping the inevitable.
I walk over to the booth selling tickets, everyone is being lectured around me. disgruntles passengers are flapping there arms up and down and complaining about the system. I'm trying to be inconspicuous and not guilty looking.
A big dykey woman comes walking over to me. Fuck. This is the end.
"Are you lining up for a ticket?"
"Yes."
"Have you been spoken to yet?"
"No."
"Why don't you have a ticket?"
"Because I had a weekly ticket but it expired yesterday, and I didn't have any cash on me to get another one, and I already knew that but I got on anyway. I'm lying. I didn't really have a weekly ticket that expired yesterday. I had a regular ticket. And I knew I had to get one and I didn't. But I would have got one if I had the money to get one, but the train was pulling up just as I got to the station. It wasn't really pulling up I would have had time. But I was only coming from Milton! that's only $2.30"
*sigh*
"You know that's a $150 offence. I need to see some ID"
"Says here you live in Burpengary, that's a $10 return trip"
"I don't live there anymore."
"You haven't changed your address, how are we going to track your previous offences, though I would rather just believe you so I don't have to do the paperwork."
"Do the paperwork. I have had warnings before."
"Why are you telling me all this!?"
"I don't know."
"Phil here is just going to finish writing out your ticket"
and then "somehow", I managed to get out of it. I totally flirted my arse off.
Out of a fine, and buying a ticket. alright.
I go to work and I'm delegated the job of Easter girl. I get a wad of cash to go to the bakery and the chocolate store. The bakery informed me that they are sold out of chocolate hot cross buns. Dammit. I really wanted those.
The boy is smiling at me, so I used the tricks from this morning and he cooked me up some especially.
I'm a FIEND!
