I don't know how I feel about the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing. In the eyes of nature humans are not monogamous creatures, marriage was created when the average life expectancy was around 30. I feel that emotions are strung to extremes and it runs a huge risk of getting hurt. But the infinite possibilities each day holds should stagger the mind, the sheer number of experiences I COULD have is uncountably breathtaking.
We live trapped in loops, history deems to repeat itself over and over. Reliving a few days over and over yet we envision only a handful of paths laid out for us branded by the social norm. We see the same thing each day and react in the same way, we think the same thoughts each day a slight variation to the last, every moment smoothly following the gentle curves of societal norms. We act like if we just get through today, tomorrow... next week... one day we will have what we want.
I don't know how talk myself into seeing what each moment could become as opposed to what is already there and whats deemed to repeat. The solution doesn't involve tempering my life to better fit someones expectations of me, or my own pre-disposed idea of what I want. It shouldn't involve constantly holding back and retaining ideas of what I want, and what I need and what is expected from me. Change your whole outlook of thinking, snap your fingers, snap your neck.
Maybe things will work out.
