Imagine this is an "imagine what would happen if…" story. Uhh… Its hypothetical!
Just randomly on Friday, two of my friends separately brought up with me what they really thought of the whole thing with R. It was basically, he is the worst thing ever for you. They couldn’t have been more right. In the beginning I really did have a lot of felt for R, but now I feel like the whole thing has turned into a twisted mat of unbeknownst emotional blackmail. Its not his fault, I know he had never maliciously intended any of this.
It was his birthday, Plans were to meet me at lunch. I really didn’t feel like seeing him after the chats in the morning. He and Jennay were off their faces. It was terrible. I was meant to meet friends at a bar in the break but it was just too embarrassing having R’s paranoia overwhelming him resulting in him being a huge fucking jerk. I just had this horrible feeling something was really wrong in the break, I started seeing double and feeling sick, but that’s not uncommon so I went back to work early.
We got pretty boozey in the office, as per usual. I said something to offend C and he left (classic me). I went to Fridays after work because I wasn’t too concerned to spend R’s birthday with him on account of he was being a complete wanker. Plans were to meet bunny boy for a drink as well. The bar tender Ed knows gave me a giant glass of wine, it sent me into the stratosphere.
That’s when I got a phone call from T*.
Hurrrrrr.
Nothing at all I wanted to hear.
I’m not going into details, it was pretty upsetting.
I shared some illicit substances with someone and had huge hallucinations, I was pretty upset so I bailed on bunny boy (classic me) and went home but not before repetitively tripping over chairs whilst trying to walk around them.
I was pretty wasted, a man was hassling me on the train and got off at my station so I sprinted home whilst talking to H on my mobile describing my trip to her. When I got home we realized there had been a break in. My uninsured lap top I got 3 days beforehand with all my photos and music backed up on it from when I was like 13 were on it, got taken. JR’s laptop and a few of other things of his got taken. He is in the same boat as me, meaning he didn’t have backups of his files either and lost everything. It didn’t seem as though anything of R’s got taken and he got up on his high horse and actually made fun of us for losing our stuff.
B called me to say she was at the train station so I went to collect her on account of she could get lost in a round room with a window. We were walking back and I was telling her what happened when some boy driving past yelled something like "aroooo" and pegged a water bottle at us. It broke on my leg and left me with a huge bruise and soaked B.
The police came round a few hours later. They were so awful. The women police officer was really blunt and short. They asked me if I had the serial number for my laptop so I went to my room to look for it. I knew it was in this bag that was on the very top shelf of my cupboard. It was a garbage bag I hadn’t had the chance to look through just yet containing my school books from grade 8 to 12, and some metal objects like hole punchers. It fell on my face when I tried to pull it down, it weighing like 40 kg+ it gave me a massive nose bleed, so I locked myself in the bathroom trying to pull it together. I didn’t come back out to talk to the police, apparently they didn’t take us seriously because R was being a total fucking wanker again asking them things like "do you find that most people who break in pawn the stuff they steal to get money to buy drugs, because that’s what I would do".
It was really weird, I got a really random phone call from a friend "are you ok? I've got a really bad feeling?" I told her what happened and she said "But is R ok? I've just go this really bad feeling"
A few of his friends were over, the ones I had taken a serious dislike to a few days beforehand and a few random ones. R was just abusing JR, B and I all night. I was really wasted there is a huge gap between time. Apparently I passed out on the verandah floor and someone moved me to my bed. I was woken up at like 5 in the morning by C hugging yelling "WAKE UPPP!! You got broken into huh? Huh? Huh? Well you know its only going to happen again!!!" I had the worst splitting headache of my entire life, but got up anyway since him and his friend had randomly come over. For some reason R was still awake, it was 5 in the morning and he was sitting by himself outside, he didn’t look well.
C stayed for a while, I started shaking uncontrollably, my head was splitting and felt like I was going to pass out so I got into R’s bed. He wasn’t well either so I went to my own bed and was woken up at 7 by Jennay and B cuddling me. That was nice I guess, but I was conscious again to my massive headache.
The police came around again to fingerprint the house but they didn’t find anything. At least this guy was really nice. JR and I cleaned everything up. I think I was a little bit concussed, I kept misjudging things and walking into walls.
That’s when we realized that R had overdosed. I’m not going to go into details here.
I had a bit of a break down. JR was a bit hysterical.
I’m going to leave a gap here.
H came to pick me up, and we went to the Southbank BBQ. It was really great, I felt awful for being a massive downer. We discovered Geordie and I’s alter ego was enormo boy and girl and combined we were the most giant doctor in the world. We can also dance really well.
We watched some hilarious you tubes about cats and one really terrible one about Gumby. I passed out in the movie, but when I actually tried to go to sleep I started thinking about everything and freaked out again.
H had to listen to my shit for a while, but then Zac and Geordie made me laugh again with the re-enactment of the dramatic reading of a real break up letter.
I went to my parent’s place the next day. I knew I had to face R when I got home so I rang a crisis line and got some advice. My parents were really good, I was meant to be moving the rest of my things but I’m considering moving out so I held off.
R sent me a text saying he doesn’t remember anything that happened and wondered why everyone had fled. I asked him to stay with his parents for a week, he refused, I told him I needed to speak with him and jennay came down for support on both parties. I asked R to be completely sober when I got home.
He was drinking a can of rum when I got back.
We talked about everything. This time the ultimatum is, if he isn’t sober or doing something about it by the weekend, I’m moving out.
He is so unhappy. Its not that he is a jerk, he is just such a mess. He has so much pressure put on him and he drowns. He is the sweetest person and I really want him to be happy but if he doesn’t do anything about it I can’t just stand back and watch. He is someone I care about so much and he comes so close to the end so many times, and on top of that how abusive he gets when he’s off his face. If he isn’t doesn’t address anything I’m going to do something drastic.
It seems JR is moving out.
He poured out his alcohol and gave Jennay his Valium.
He was sober the last 2 nights.
Last night he told me, Hope I don’t mind he is having a girl over for ‘dinner’ on Wednesday. How fucking considerate of him.
It turns out R's stereo got stolen as well, we just didn't realise at the time
Oh and my dad called and said my brother has been lying to me. He hasn’t actually been fixing my car as of late. Its been broken down on some main road for a few days. Apparently its going to cost a massive amount to fix it.
